I'll leave it to you to decide which of us Amandas is the most amazing conversationalist.
I'm not a chatter. I find it extremely difficult and awkward to sustain conversation without a specific goal in mind.
For instance, this is what I consider a successful conversation...
Me: What time is dinner?
Somebody: Seven o' clock.
Me: Thanks!
By contrast, this kind of conversation is a challenge ...
Somebody: Hi! I haven't seen you in sooooo long! How ARE you?
Me: Umm. Great. Or OK. OK, yeah. Do you mean today or in general?
Somebody: Today ... I guess.
Me: Today I'm ... uh, really stressed actually. Billy has therapy and I have three freelance assignment due this week and I think Willow may have an ear infection.
Somebody: Well ... that sounds .... GREAT TO SEE YOU! (scurries away)
OK, I'm exaggerating a bit. I have no problem talking with my family or close friends. But outside that very limited circle, I get nervous and I either talk too much or too little and no matter how innocuous the conversation, I replay it over and over again in my head later and analyze just how stupid I sounded and how much the person in question is probably currently making fun of me to lots of other people that we both know.
Did you ever see the movie Trainspotting? You know the scene where the guy goes to a job interview on speed? That's me at any given party setting without any chemical enhancements. Either I'm maniacally over-talkative, or I spend most of the night in the bathroom, texting people.
The telephone is the worst. I am not exaggerating when I say that I have an actual phobia of talking on the phone. I truly truly hate it and will avoid talking on it at all costs. Love email. Love texting – now that I've figured out how to do it. Even like Skyping, because I can see people's faces and don't have to wonder whether or not they're rolling their eyes or frowning in confusion as we talk.
My idea of a SUCCESSFUL phone conversation...
Dominoes guy: Dominoes! Hello, Mr. Broadfoot (they see David's name on their caller ID).
Me: Large Supreme pizza, please.
Dominoes guy: We have a special--
Me: LARGE SUPREME PIZZA, PLEASE!!
Dominoes guy: Are you still at 18--
Me: YES! (hang up)
I know that I'm unlikely to screw up a phone conversation with the Dominoes guy. Anything more open-ended will probably involve lots of awkward silences until one or the other of us claims to smell something burning in order to end it.
All of this does, believe it or not, have a point. As the mother of an autistic child (who was clearly genetically predisposed to have some social communication challenges), I've had to learn to narrate my life. All Billy's speech therapists and teachers tell us that it's important to talk to Billy ALL THE TIME about what's going on in his world all around us: as we drive in the car, as we walk to school, as we play and eat and bathe and --
That is just not me. Until I had kids, I spent most of my day in complete peaceful silence. One thing that makes Dave and I perfect for each other is that we have easy silences. And when we do talk, it's about something: the kids, politics, literature, how much bread and beer we have left. Important stuff.
On the walk to school, for instance: When Dave walks him to school, it's apparently a non-stop adventure. They look out for quicksand and climb the “highest hill” (a slight bump on the sidewalk) and barely escape the Jungle of Prickles (someone's overgrown yard).
When it's my turn, I really try. But you know it's bad when my autistic son is much better at suggesting conversation topics than I am. I mostly just warn him, agree and point at things.
WALKING TO SCHOOL
Me: Billy, look both ways before crossing the street.
Billy: Look out! It's the Jungle of Prickles!
Me: A jungle? Where? (Spotting neighbor glaring at us from overgrown yard.) Oh, well, maybe they haven't had a chance to mow their lawn recently.
Billy: We made it! Over the highest hill!
Me: Watch your step--
Billy: It's nice to see Christmas.
Me: Yes! It IS nice to see Christmas decorations every there. Look! They have a ... plastic baby Jesus in their yard. Sleeping in a magazine rack. And he lights up.
Billy: It's Joseph. And Mary. Mary cuts your hair!
Me: Argh.
But I'm trying. If I'm going to ask my son to step outside his comfort zone every day, to make eye contact, to smile, to greet people, I can at least make an effort to be slightly more interesting to a four-year-old.
Reader Comments
Willow actually DOES choose the winner of last week's caption contest, as you can see for yourself ...
And our definitive image of Thanksgiving this year is also brought to us by our dear daughter. Caption this one and Willow will choose the winner by next Monday -- who will receive a brand-new DVD of the movie "Elf" with Will Ferrell. You're really going to have to work hard to outdo your efforts of last week, but I know you can do it!
Reader Comments
Not enough coffee to be funny but that's never stopped me from trying...
"After half a glass, Jack decided to abandon his beanstalk pursuits and set up camp near the merlot."
PS, your clean house in the background all decorated for Christmas makes me want to grab a glass myself! I need a fire lit under me. Or I need to just step away from the computer. Or both. Anyway, yours looks great!
Hey, No Fair!
I saw mine go flying across the room! There was no way it could get selected!
LOL--that was pretty funny actually! Good job Willow!
Caption:
"I've always been a 'glass half-full' kind of guy."
Total 3 comments
BigDaddyAutism.com
There are a few things I try to do every day: bathe, feed my children, and read Big Daddy's blog. BigDaddyAutism writes about life with the Big Daddy family, which includes himself, Mrs. Big Daddy, his son, Griffin -- who happens to be autistic -- and Griffin's Lil' Sis. Not only does each wonderful post highlight the ups and downs of parenting on the spectrum, but he makes me laugh coffee out of my nose at least five times a week. I've mentioned to BD before that his heartwarming and hilarious stories about Griffin, who's currently thriving in middle school, sometimes make me think (and hope) I'm getting a glimpse of my Billy's future.
Billy has only just started asking questions. Today's guest post from Big Daddy is a perfect example of what I can imagine in our future ...
--------------------------------
When Amanda asked me to guest post on her blog, my first thought was that there must be some sort of mistake. She must've meant to e-mail Allie Brosh from "Hyperbole and a Half" with her 4 million visitors a month. Once I confirmed that it was actually Big Daddy, with my 6 semi-loyal (and completely deranged) readers that Amanda was looking for, I was honored. And horrified. And hungry. (I'm always hungry)
It's okay for me to spend 20 minutes banging out some moderately funny story about my 13 year old autistic son for my own blog. But I needed to present something a little more, how shall I put it, "good" for Amanda's blog. So I decided to pull out a post I am particularly proud of which went up on my blog on its second or third day in existence. It is a nice glimpse into how I think my son's mind works and, back then I actually put some time and effort into my posts. Besides, my mother-in-law was my only visitor in those days, so this post is like brand spanking new to everyone in the world except Big Nana and myself. So, please enjoy .....
This is a food item that deserves repeated conversation!
Mexican Pizza
Occasionally, Griffin, out of nowhere, will just blurt out selections from a school lunch menu he may have been studying weeks earlier. It is not unusual for us to be driving, having a conversation which does not involve him, and hear Griffin yell, “Mexican Pizza!” or "Chicken Sandwich!" from the backseat.
It’s not like he wanted Mexican Pizza or a Chicken Sandwich for lunch, nor was it remotely related to what we were talking about - he just felt the need to say it. Like a living, breathing pop-up ad, he does this frequently with all sorts of nouns, verbs, and adjectives. I bet Griffin’s spontaneity, brevity, and randomness would make him hugely successful on Twitter.
Mrs. Big Daddy and I often wonder what’s going on inside Griffin's head. She sometimes describes her theory using the analogy of an old style office Rolodex. The cards inside his mind are furiously spinning around and around. Occasionally the Rolodex stops for an instant and Griffin will blurt out whatever thought is on the selected card. Then the Rolodex starts to spin again.
I think of the bouncing balls the State Lottery uses to pick the Lotto numbers on Saturday nights. All the ping pong balls bounce around in the air chamber. One finally pops out and that’s Griffin’s thought for the moment.
Either way, it’s pretty hectic in there.
Tonight, on the way to dinner, Griffin got me to join in on this madness. Our conversation went like this.
Griffin: "Daddy, I ask you a question?"
Me: "Sure Griff."
Griffin: "Say 'Fake'."
Me: "Fake."
Griffin: "Why you say 'Fake', Daddy?"
Me: "Argh."
Griffin: "Why you say 'Argh', Daddy?"
I think this exchange sums up our life with Griffin pretty well.
Reader Comments
Big Daddy is a hunk
Wow. I think we can all agree on one thing - that Big Daddy dude is one handsome specimen.
Handsome and Funny
Love the Rolodex analogy. I think many of my son Moe's issues come from his brain being so busy all the time.
@jencull
You know, I might be offended at being called deranged if I didn't actually agree with you :D
Love the rolodex analogy, that fits the bill perfectly in our house:) Jen
Way to Go, Big Daddy!
I think that the lottery balls is the more likely analogy, but that's only because that is how my brain works as well!
Empathy Can Be Fun!
Just as I empathize with parenting puzzling children, I can empathize with Amanda's laughing so hard coffee comes out of her nose. Big Daddy makes me laugh so hard that I cry. I've even got my kids reading his blog.
Griffin is a hoot! I'm still thinking your family could probably do a sitcom :)
Thanks to BD, I've discovered LIFE IS A SPECTRUM. I look forward to reading yet another wonderful blog.
Punk'd
I read the first post, thought, "Who's mackin' on Big Daddy?" then read the name...D'oh!
I love Griffin
I've said it before and I'll say it again: Griffin is 5 years older than my kid and these stories you tell are my future.
And HEY! I'M one of those 6 semi-loyal and totally deranged readers. YAY!!
Big Daddy Sucks Donkey Balls
I am offended that you are using your son's disability as entertainment. Aren't you supposed to be off in a corner crying?
Tweet!
Okay, I have to know if Griffin starts tweeting. That will be enough to make me sign up! @Lynn, I thought you were Ann for a minute. =)
Sounds familiar
This is probably a pretty good analogy! =) My son pulls out a lot of randomness too! lol But he's getting a bit better about it too. Ok, so I don't get sarcasm really well, and I'm wondering if the comment from lynn was sarcasm? Because........ if not, then that comment offends me. =) Seriously, off crying in a corner? Really? Please tell me it's sarcasm? yes?
Actually, it's a parody
Lynn is riffing on a jerk who pooed in the comments thread of her guest post on Big Daddy's blog. No worries.
SEO
Thanks to Lynn, now every time someone searches Google for "Big Daddy Sucks Donkey Balls" they are going to wind up here. I'm gonna go give it try now. (With the Safe Search Settings on)
HAHAHAHAHA!
Really funny post! But the comments were even FUNNIER!
OOHHHHH! ok...
I'm such a dork! lol I just was really confused since I was out of the loop! :)
I like the rolodex and the lottery ball imagery...w my son I always say he has no internal dialogue--it's all verbal and right out there where we can all hear...and 9 times out of 10 it has nothing at all to do with anything going on at the moment...although he is really good an portraying dialogue, any dialogue, that he has heard in any form or another.
Total 15 comments
This masterpiece is available as a T-shirt, wall clock or hand puppet for a small fee.
It's weird the things that stick out in your memory. I can remember one Thanksgiving while I was still in elementary school when the teacher had given us the assignment to take each letter in the word “Thanksgiving” and come up with one thing for which we were thankful starting with that letter.
I was going like gangbusters till I got to “V.” I couldn't think of a single thing. “V?!” What is there to be thankful for that starts with a “V?” I didn't care anything about the violin, was completely ambivalent about the state of Virginia and verbs.
I was so proud of myself when I finally came up with “vision” that I turned to the girl next to me to show off. Her “V” word was “Very Happy.”
That didn't even make sense. How could you be thankful for “very happy?” I can remember trying to explain to her how that didn't make sense ...
And 30-plus years later it's still bothering me, because I am THAT much of a nerd. A nerd who LOVES the holidays. I love getting turkey crafts sent home in the kids backpacks and going to parties where the kids wear slightly racist Indian headdresses and we celebrate the fact that we left England for a better life! (That last bit is a little in-joke between me and the hubby. He calls Thanksgiving “That time of year when you Yanks celebrate giving smallpox to the natives, right?”)
I have so much to be thankful for this week, this year, and I'm going to do it (literally) old school-style:
T is for toilet-training! We're 90 percent there! I can't get any more specific without spoiling your Thanksgiving dinner.
H is for hair cuts. My beautiful little man finally got one from the nicest, most patient beautician at a Supercuts. Her name was Mary. Now that we've started reading Christmas stories, every time the Nativity comes up, Billy points out “Baby Jesus and Joseph and Mary ... Mary cuts your hair.”
A is for autism. It's always there; a part of every holiday, for better or worse.
N is for Nan, as her grandkids call my mom. She has a close relationship with all her grandchildren, and particularly with Billy. There are so many times that she can get through to him when no one else can. He's made so many breakthroughs in her company. It just goes to show that sometimes love is the best therapy.
K is for Kindermusik! I discovered both Billy and Willow's love and talent for music in this special class, and we'll miss it after this semester when our wonderful Ms. Jaci moves on to other musical opportunities. So, Jaci, next semester we're cool to just drop them off at your house on Saturday mornings, right?
S is for Sisters: Mine is hosting Thanksgiving dinner this year! Thank goodness, because my house currently looks like we keep a herd of goats in the living room. “S” is also for Willow's favorite new way of describing herself: “I saucy!” she tells us regularly.
G is for gymnastics. Billy rules the school on the balance beam. This from the kid who literally falls out of his chair at the dinner table 16 times before he can finish a cheese sandwich.
I is for “I,” a pronoun that Billy has started occasionally using. It's still a rare occurrence, and you're still likely to hear him scream, “You don't need a poo-poo!” at the top of his lungs, much to the alarm of passersby.
V is for vegetables, which thanks to ABA therapy, we are occasionally managing to get our son to swallow. With great effort. And bribery. Um, I mean reinforcers.
I is for Immodium and Immodium for Kids, without which our family wouldn't have made it through the last week. (Am I oversharing again?)
N is for neurotypical. I may write more about Billy, because this is an autism blog. But I thank God every day for both my kids and the fact that the second one has been so easy ... which probably means, of course, that on her 16th birthday she's going to get her eyelids pierced and elope with a motorcycle gang. Eh, it's still been worth it.
G is for gang. HA! Just kidding. Actually, I'll go with that – my gang. You know who you are. I'm related to some of you. Some of you I've adopted because you listen to me whine so regularly that you're entitled to be the beneficiary on something. Some of you I've never actually met, officially, face-to-face, but I talk about you to the rest of the gang so frequently that we've decided to give you a jacket and let you in on the secret handshake. To all of you: Thank you.
Hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving.
Reader Comments
Not So Bad
My baby sister got an eyelid piercing and eloped with a biker gang. It's not so bad. We see her every now and again on America's Most Wanted.
Have a great Thanksgiving.
LOL today my oldest, Corbin (8) , told me he was so thankful for the Pilgrims because without them we wouldn't have Thanksgiving- I quickly cut him to the core and asked shouldn't you be thankful for the Native Americans...his response, "You mean the Indians?"
Big Daddy stole my comment.
But, it is good to know that somewhere out there, someone's representing my praenomen well. (Can you guess what my new word of the week is?)
"Eyelid-piercing"...ouch! Maybe she'll go for something less disturbing, like purple hair!
Fun list, Amanda...I hope you guys have an amazing Thanksgiving!
Wendy
A VERY Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!
Just a quick comment between calories. I'm pretty sure I'm well on my way to 4,000 for the day, calories that is. Love you post, again. You'll have to write a cr@ppy one soon so I can say something mean... but not today, on Thanksgiving. You all have a lovely day. We flew to NY to celebrate with my wife's family. It's very Norman Rockwell here. Talk to you later.
--Michael (aka: http://adaddyblog.com)
p.s. My daughter did Kindermusik since she was a tiny girl. Oh, and the eye piercing comment made me laugh... LOL as they say online.
N is for Nougat
I tried to do this exercise based on a prompt from my friend Sherri's blog, but when I could only come up with "nougat" for the first N, I knew that I had to throw in the towel.
T is for...
T is for Thank God it's over. I know that makes as much sense as very happy but I hope toucan forgive me. It's all I've got.
Total 7 comments
Ok, I'm taking care of pukey kids today, so I leave you with the photo below. Give me your best caption ideas, and the winner (chosen by Willow) will win a brand-new (I promise, it hasn't been watched even once by my kids) special edition of How the Grinch Stole Christmas (the cartoon, not the one with Jim Carey) still in its shrink wrap.
This is a shot of me and Willow from Billy's Thanksgiving lunch at school. And yes, that is a giant trash can right next to our table.
Just post your caption ideas below, and Willow will choose the winner by Monday. (Disclaimer: Baby cannot read and may be assisted by mother.)
Reader Comments
DAVE!
JUST. TAKE. THE. PICTURE. NOW!
Seriously, so sorry you have the puke; we all had that last year for Thanksgiving and it was awful. I think this might be the first Thanksgiving in his whole life where EJD will actually sit down and eat Thanksgiving dinner with us. It only took five years!!
OK, I gotta get back to polishing my silver ;) ......
caption
I have my eye on the pumpkin pie!!
caption
(prepare for a lion-from-Wizard-of-Oz reference:) "If I...were king...of the forrrrrrrrrrrrrrrest!"
Sorry your kids are illin'. It's tough to watch little ones fight the yuckies--especially when you're not feeling so great yourself. I hope you're all on the mend so you can enjoy a happy and turkey-filled Thanksgiving!
Turkey? Where's the Beef?!
This One Has a Snowball's Chance in ......
Really, mommy! I DO NOT need the Heimlich maneuver!
Remove this silly hat and nobody gets hurt.
Or -
"So .... hungry.... Must ... eat .... mommy's ... hand."
Or-
"You won't be smiling after I swallow your pinkie."
Or-
"Vertigo. All those colors in your blouse are giving me vertigo. Gonna hurl. Where's the trash can?"
(Sorry about that last one. It really is a pretty blouse. I swear.)
@jencyll
Willow the vampire, as she moves in on your neck.................
I need to driiiiiiiink!
Don't enter me in the comp, I couldn't view the DVD anyway as different regions so am just joining in for fun:) Jen
The first rule of Fight Club is, you do not talk about Fight Club.
The second rule of Fight Club is, you DO NOT talk about Fight Club.
"We already did the smiling shot - now's the silly face one. Right?"
ESP?
Think she spotted the trashcan and had a vision of the days ahead? Your poor family. I hope you are all back to healthy and felt great for Thanksgiving!
Total 10 comments
No Snall Talk
Thursday December 02 2010 12:28:13 pm
Big Daddy
I thought you were taking your hatred of chit chat too far by removing the Post comment button. If Billy is anything like my boy, you are in for a lot of chit chatting over the next few years. A lot. Oh, boy. A lot.
commenting is working again!
Thursday December 02 2010 12:29:02 pm
Amanda Broadfoot
Thanks to everyone who emailed me to let me know that commenting wasn't working this morning. As you can see, it's back up and running, so feel free to make fun of my social awkwardness with abandon ...
When did we get so socially awkward???
Thursday December 02 2010 12:31:23 pm
Laurie
Oh, girl, you've totally captured it here! I used to be a savvy professional. A put-together teacher who lead a department and held community meetings and taught bible studies for my church. And then I had kids with neuropsych problems. More than one. And it shorted my brain, and confidence, and flicked me out of whack from the rest of the planet. I totally know what you mean about the isolation of just not knowing where to go with the "how are you?" question. Some days I let 'em have it. Some days I say nothing. Some days I'm witty and silly. Most days I'm lonely because I can't be myself. Sucks. But very very good to know you understand. Once again ;). Love and hugs to you, my dear!
So Funny!
Thursday December 02 2010 04:28:42 pm
Cheryl D.
You come across as so verbal here! Who would have known?
Thursday December 02 2010 05:09:26 pm
Emma Jayne
You are so right about the narration! I never really put the two together till now. I thought I was becoming anti-social in my old age. I'm just tired of talking and describing the world. It is like having a root canal to have small talk. You and I should get together and text over coffee!
A lurker!
Thursday December 02 2010 05:17:21 pm
Megs
I usually lurk, found you a few weeks, or maybe longer, ago on COM and have been reading since my son is very similar to yours. Now I am shocked because you just described me exactly. Down to the phone phobia and everything. Just wanted to say thank you for making me feel like I am not alone!
Megs
So it's not just me!
Thursday December 02 2010 08:47:55 pm
Ashley
Reading this and the comments have just made my year. I thought I was just weird. I've never really been a chatter and I've always avoided the phone. But since we've entered this new world of ASD, I'm just tired. Too tired to make small talk with the lady who's biggest worry is where to meet her friends for lunch. I never really know how to respond to "How've you been?" Most of the time, you can tell they're not really up for a therapy session. And that is why I love this blogging thing! It's like group therapy. For free.
I am so with you
Thursday December 02 2010 09:30:56 pm
E. Peterman
Man, can I relate. Online, I am chatty, quick on my feet and full of witty banter. In person, I stammer. My attempts at small talk are painful, and I don't like to make eye contact. I like your point about keeping these things in mind when it comes to our kids on the spectrum. Good post!
You've described me to a T!
Thursday December 02 2010 10:03:29 pm
Papa Bear
I've always earned high scores on tests of verbal skills. Not bragging, just stating a fact. It's people I don't get. Why do they insist on talking when they have nothing to say? Why are they always asking questions, but getting offended if you answer honestly? What do they want from me? Why can't they just leave me alone?
sure you don't have ADD like me? =)
Friday December 03 2010 04:47:05 am
Jill
That sounds exactly like me! =) EVERY... LAST... BIT! Especially the phone thing. ugh. Actually I don't even think I can say especially that. It's all equally bad for me! =) Glad to hear I'm not alone. I had to go to some spouses' function for my husband's squadron, and it was miserable!!!! I never seem to realize what's appropriate to conversate about. So it's much better talking to family and close friends- because nothing's off limits! =)
Talking sucks
Friday December 03 2010 05:07:41 am
Alain
I'm trying to earn my bread working as a stock broker. Last year, at the "client" Christmas party, I told a poor unsuspecting client the exciting story of getting a pet fish for my two boys. The poor guy smiled and nodded politely, bless him. I don't think I'm going to make it in this biz.
Loved Trainspotting, too. I have a feeling my boys will love trainspotting, too, but in a more literal sense :(
Me too! Me too!
Friday December 03 2010 09:33:00 am
Maura
This is just a fabulous post. I can relate to so much of it! Honestly, I think the telephone is the devil. I avoid it at all cost, and when I absolutely HAVE to use it, I get so nervous I just talk over the other person, until we're both saying, "What? What did you say? No, I'm sorry, YOU go first." And then I hang up feeling as though I've just run the gauntlet of my own idiocy.
And in-person conversations? I can't hold up my end of it. Usually, I just turn the tables on the other person, like this:
Person: Well, hey, Maura, how are you?
Me: [Looking like a deer in headlights] How are YOU?
Person: I'm great. Been busy. Good to see you. How are the boys?
Me: [Fidgeting nervously] How's YOUR family?
It's awful. So embarrassing.
I wonder if that's why we've turned to writing. It's our own space to fashion our words exactly the way we want them, no matter how long it takes.
I have a feeling you're better at explaining the world to Billy than you suspect. Because lord knows you can write it!
Can I Join The "Challenged at Small Talk" Club Too?
Friday December 03 2010 10:36:57 am
writerwoman61
I'm a much better writer than I am a talker (go figure, for someone who took the Broadcast Journalism course in college - maybe I just need to have everything I say scripted!).
I'm hopeless in the school yard...I'm older than most of the other moms, and I don't have much in common with any of them!
I have to talk to people who come into the store though, which I find fairly easy...I usually ask them where they're from and what kind of books they like to read...
I hate the phone...I never call anybody without a reason...I don't understand people who call "just to talk"!
Wendy
Friday December 03 2010 02:46:17 pm
Beth (OMG! Yummy)
Saying hi from SITS. Love this post. I have a son with Asperger's and I have a similar phone phobia to you. Love talking and communicating but the phone is not my favorite. As for the kid, he's either extremely verbal, or not at all. We do a lot of verbal coaching to teach him social cues that are obvious to us but not to him. I can so empathize with your situation. Love that you can blog and laugh about it!
What is wrong with you people?!?!
Friday December 03 2010 08:06:44 pm
Lynn
Everybody just wrote paragraphs about how they hate chit chat....I don't believe it for a second! I can talk your ear off about anything, but it doesn't mean that I like the whole "narrating your every move" thing that we are supposed to do. That's what the TV is for. JK...sheesh.
Not working
Saturday October 22 2011 01:49:03 pm
Jerrod
Im having issues with your site images in IE
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Tuesday October 25 2011 11:23:26 pm
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I've invariably earned high scores on tests of verbal skills. Not bragging, simply stating a reality. It's folks i do not get. Why do they implement talking once they don't have anything to say? Why are they invariably asking queries, however obtaining offended if you answer honestly? What do they require from me? Why cannot they only leave me alone?
Total 17 comments